I blogged a few months ago about How to Avoid Post-Wedding Blues... And one of the tips I recommended was not to do it all at once - not to go on a honeymoon straight after the wedding. This week, we just got back from our honeymoon and this weekend is our first wedding anniversary. I know; imagine being married to me for a whole year! Ha!
This has completely cemented my thinking that we were doing the right thing (for us!)
I know this may not work for some people, it may be the only time people can have off work, there will be all kinds of reasons some couples choose to go on honeymoon straight away following their wedding.
Before I go on, I acknowledge it's tradition for the couple to go on honeymoon straight after their nuptials... Reasons this doesn't add up for me personally in this day and age are - reason 1. Tradition is not so widely followed in every aspect of couple's lives and this reflects massively on their choices for their wedding day - traditions are being altered and thrown out more and more. Reason 2. The whole tradition of going on honeymoon straight away was to visit distant relatives who lived too far away to be able to come to the couple's wedding. Now, please correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't know one couple who has gone on honeymoon (be it straight away or prolonged) in the UK for the sole purpose of visiting relatives then coming home.
So, there really is little need in most couple's lives to go off on honeymoon at all. Why do we still do it then? Why is this one tradition that, despite being altered in time scale; we still relish? My opinion? For the holiday! Let's face it, we were still going to want to get away and relax whether we'd gotten married or not!! We also kept saying "oh why not?! It is our honeymoon after all!" It's the perfect excuse to possibly spend more than you would usually on your dream trip to paradise.
I said at the beginning of this post that I am so, so glad we made the right decision to wait and not honeymoon straight away. This is simply because I do not think I'd still be in the sane land of the living if I'd had both stresses to deal with at the same time!!
Getting married was one big ball of stress I feel I've already highlighted in the past. Well, so is going on holiday! The worrying about forgetting something, worrying your case is going to go missing *sobs uncontrollably at the mere thought!* Worrying about wherever you've parked your car keeping it safe, worrying your 2:30am alarm won't go off so you'll miss your cab/flight, worrying you'll leave a window open at home. Worrying you've forgotten to throw away those potatoes that were in the back of your cupboard - and the prospect of coming home to a stinky kitchen! Checking then re-checking then checking again the weight of your case, the size and weight of your hand luggage - it's right on the edge of their allowance - ARRRRR!! Worrying that people will guess you're away (on honeymoon y'know, not holiday! Haha!) as you need this kept private, obviously for security reasons. So, I am very, very happy I did not have all that to worry about on top of will my dress fit? How am I getting to the registry office this week now the transport has cancelled? Have I packed enough underwear? Have I packed the right underwear? Will my instructions for how the tables are to be set up and decorated be followed? Is it going to rain? What if the photographer doesn't turn up? What would we do if the DJ doesn't show?? Will everything be set up in time? Have I got everything I need; to not only be away from my home for one day and night (wearing an impractical can't-travel-anywhere-in white dress) but for a whole fortnight?!
Another thing that didn't feel right for me would be travelling in the wrong name. When I got married to my lovely husband he asked me to take his name - to make it so we were an item who could be identified as such immediately upon introduction. A lot of people ask why I didn't double-barrel my surnames. That's an easy one to answer - my first name is already double barrelled and my new(ish) surname is long. I didn't want both my names to be double-barrelled names... If I had I'd still be filling out the forms now to change my name; it'd take so long! I've not found any forms with boxes or lines long enough for my current full name as it is! Not that I have to explain why we followed tradition on that particular topic but I wanted to. It absolutely would not feel right to me to travel in the wrong name. At work I am Mrs W, I haven't been Miss R for a year now. On my drivers license; which was due for renewal the month after we wed so was changed the day after the ceremony, on all my documentation. I changed my name everywhere within 5 days of getting married, apart from my passport. I still had 2 and a half years on it and I'm not one to waste money! I, at first, thought it maybe wouldn't matter too much to me. We went to the travel agents back in March to discuss booking our honeymoon. They asked for the lead name. My husband (as usual) selected me! My name was not the name I had on my bank details, on anything really... It didn't feel right paying under Mr & Mrs W and booking under Miss R. Needless to say we didn't book that afternoon, I got home and immediately filled out a form to alter my passport to that of one with my correct name on it.
We are Mr and Mrs W. We have been that since they wrote it on the envelope of our beloved wedding certificate back on that sunny evening in August 2014. We booked our honeymoon and enjoyed it under Mr and Mrs W and people could call me pathetic for caring; but it made it feel right and I'm so glad I did.
The one downside to not going immediately is everyone else just calls it your holiday. But, if we'd got married a fortnight ago they would have wished us a 'lovely honeymoon'... not just a lovely holiday! (Remind me; what's the difference again?!)
As I always say when writing my opinion; what works for us won't necessarily be what's best for others; as always - simply my thoughts, feelings and opinion.
I plan to blog about our experiences from booking to living our honeymoon ... I hope you enjoy!
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